Not getting lost

It's late. Not late for most people but im typing on about 4hrs of sleep which is the least amount i have had in several weeks. Noah didn't sleep well last night, up at 11apm/4am then i was up at 5:30am for work and not a chance for a nap today. Usually i can get more than that each night so if i start on tangents, please forgive me.

Tonight i caught up on Ambers blogg(Seth's wife) and read about a weeks worth of posts. It always makes me happy to read them for several reasons. First and foremost, because it gives me a chance to hear what is going on with them. Amber and I talk from time to time, more lately because I just had a baby and who better to talk to then someone who has had 3, but it gives me a chance to see snapshots into their lives as well as see what cute thing my little nephews have done. Secondly, reminds me of how artistic and creative she is. She is artsy and i LOVE IT! I try to be artsy, want to be artsy, but im more of a sporty gal with artistic edges. I don't draw, i don't write poetry, and i can't really tell you of a movie or recording artist that is not main stream and please don't look at my spelling or sentence structure(sometimes i think my mom and amber cringe).

Amber and Seth have three boys. Isaac turns 4 this October so you can imagine the crazy ciaos that surrounds their house. And although she probably watches more Veggie Tales or other kid movies and spends most of her time teaching her boys how to tie their shoe, not to eat buggs or where milk comes from she still, in my opinion, has not lost the essence of Amber. Her artistic side is still alive and even though she is surrounded by sometimes screeming boys, she still takes time to express herself artistically. She has not lost who she is even though at times im sure she doesn't think so.

That is something that I like to copy as I raise Noah. Yes I am a mom. Yes I change diapers, read Brown Bear and spend most of my time talking to others about Noah and how much he has grown or what new things he is doing but one thing i don't want to loose, is ME. I think many moms get totally engrossed in their kids and forget the importance of rejuvenating themselves and taking time to do something that is just for them. I want to be that Mom that doesn't feel guilty about going to the book store and gets some random book and sits and drinks a latte or finds the newest cool shop or food joint(im a foodie) and just take it all in. At 32, i'm still trying to figure out what my thing is, what I will do to keep ME alive even with kids. I'm still exploring what that is but I do know one thing, i'm going to look for it till i find it.